Unhappily Ever After

- Season 1

(1995)

Meet the Malloys. Cynical Jack and devil-may-care Jenny are separating, drop-dead-gorgeous daughter Tiffany is self-absorbed to the core, and older brother Ryan is just plain dumb. Little Ross's toy bunny, Mr. Floppy, ends up being Jack's talking, worldly-wise companion in his new shack.

Big dinner invite for Jack to Jenny's. It's their Anniversary, but Jack has forgotten, all he can think about is getting a VCR for the lonely hours in his bachelor flat, and scoring some toilet paper.

Jack scores an unlikely date, with vivacious Miss Taylor, Ryan's teacher. Anxiety gnaws at Jennie as she feels she is losing control over him.

Jennie needs funds for breast enlargement. All hell breaks loose when she tries to sell her engagement ring, only to discover the diamond is a dud. To make up, Jack has to sell his baseball signed by Babe Ruth, but turns out this gift from Jennie had been a fake as well.

Jack runs over his mother-in-law with his brand-new moped, and faces having to crawl before her unless he wants to get sued and go to jail. The one thing that still makes him a man, that he vowed he would never do.

Flight of the rabbits. Send out on an errand to buy tampons, Jack grabs Mr. Floppy and dashes off to Mexico, to never have to go buy tampons ever again.

Jack fires Ryan up to rebel against Jennie making him do the unmanly chores, and causes Ryan to get kicked out, knocking at his door for shelter. Not what he had in mind. And pretty soon, Jennie comes to dump Ross off as well. Where is the place of man in the natural order of the world?

Mr. Floppy loses his lucky rabbit's foot as a charm to Ryan, who narrowly misses out on scoring a hot blond date with it, but after Tiffany scores a diamond engagement ring, and Jennie's objective to enter the Betty Ford clinic to score a rich husband might become reality, Jack has great difficulty securing it back for his furry little friend.

Jennie cannot find a date, so she sets out to seduce Mark, the painter boy and local neighborhood stud, but finds herself going to the dogs.

Jennie finds out her new boyfriend is married and must find a way to get rid of him.

Tiffany wants to traipse off to the lake with an amorous boy, but like Mr. Floppy warns, boys are after only one thing; meanwhile, Ryan has a date with a dominatrix, but who cares?

Jennie, who never had a Prom date, chaperons the school dance, where Tiffany is in charge of organization, but she has invested the money in blue-chip war stock, only now, peace has broken out worldwide. Jennie has to rush in to help, it's her last chance to go to the dance, after all.

Much to Tiffany's dismay, Jennie is going to give a motivational speech at school, but Jack doesn't want to miss out on playing basketball with the guys. Ryan believes himself to be a business 'mongol' after a win at monopoly, and Mr. Floppy feels taken for granted. Cringing shame for everybody at the school hall.