White Van Man

- Season 2

(2012)

Already irked by expectant father Darren bringing his robot baby to work, Ollie is further confused by a new phone app which leads him to rip out a kitchen at a house where the brief was actually to build a bedroom for the new orphanage. Winging it he explains to the man from the council that he was about to supply the new bedroom for free, hoping his act of charity will bring his business good publicity. Unfortunately Liz and Emma, literally fighting over him, destroy the work in hand but somehow a miracle occurs as the new orphanage is about to be officially opened.

Discovering that Darren has been moonlighting for his Polish business rival Andrzej Ollie sacks him and lets him work full time for the opposition though the Poles' industrious work ethic proves too much for lazy Darren,especially when he is also expected to drink vodka and get a tattoo. In the absence of a suitable replacement Ollie takes Liz on his new assistant and she is very efficient. However she recognises that Darren and Ollie are an established team and graciously resigns,allowing Darren to happily return to the fold.

When Ollie calls Darren to find out why he has not turned up for work, he is disinclined to believe Darren's story of being trapped in a cupboard. Darren however really is trapped in a strange cupboard and must turn to Tony for help.

Ollie arranges to meet old flame Jasmine for drinks, before remembering that he has already invited Emma out to dinner. Meanwhile, Tony is nervous about his first date for many years and Darren must do a job at the house of his hated former teacher.

Ollie is shocked when captain Ben drops him from the local Saturday League football team for being too old,when he hits his thirty-second birthday. Answering a newspaper advert he joins another team,which includes Darren,but they are rubbish and stand no chance against his old side. When Liz starts dating Ollie's young replacement - who turns out to be only fifteen - and gets him grounded before a vital game Ollie has his chance of revenge.

Disturbing burglars at Emma's cafe Ollie is shocked to unmask one of them as Darren,who claims he needs money to pay off a debt to his pregnant girl-friend Joanne's scary uncle Reggie but that his accomplice Ricky has the thousand pounds stolen from the till. Ollie confronts Ricky,threatening to have him arrested unless the money is returned. Unable to give Reggie the money Darren is forced to turn up at the registry office to marry Joanne but then the police arrive,claiming that Emma and Ricky were working an insurance scam between them. Most of the wedding party is ...