Ideal

- Season 5

(2009)

Whilst Jenny lies upright but comatose in his bed,imagining a series of dream sequences featuring her in ballet outfits flitting about the room, Moz swears that he will now give up dealing for good and get himself a proper job. None of his customers believe him though and all,annoyingly,seem to think he can snap Jenny out of it. Feeling neglected by Cartoon Herad,Judith initiates young Marco into his first sexual experience.

Brian drops by with his most bizarre 'scrummy' pairing yet, con-joined twins Jake and Dinos whilst Alan attempts to escape from Fist. Moz is finding it hard to resist a number of attractive women callers who,strangely enough find him desirable. So much so that when Jenny finally wakes up from her coma she finds Moz heavily involved with prostitute Monique.

Moz is adamant that he will not return to dealing and so Judith gets him a job at the Easy Spud take-away,which is very boring and he has to stop himself from nodding off. Alan makes his escape from Fist,whom he has recognized as Vicar Fistwick,a homicidal man of the cloth and jail-bird and goes to Keith and Carol for help. Unfortunately Carol,being blind,panics and kills him,leaving Jeff to help her dispose of the body. Alan is not the only casualty. Cartoon Head,having heard of Judith's infidelity,is out for revenge on Marco but kills his twin brother by mistake.

Having been fired from the Easy Spud for falling asleep in the pepperoni sauce,Moz scours the Salford Gazette for work,turns down Brian's suggestion that he become a table-dancer at the Schlong-Fellows gay club and ends up being coerced by Cartoon Head to sell a brick of heroin. The Silicon Valets turn up at his flat with a documentary crew - and Alan Yentob - in tow,making a film about them. Although Moz denies dealing,unfortunately the film exposes the heroin and he is arrested and charged by P.C.

Moz is not happy with P.C. for busting him and lets him know it. The prospect of a long jail sentence is not inviting and there is only one thing for it. Moz and Jenny will skip the country and start a new life in Portugal. Unfortunately with the drugs money gone he is strapped for cash and Keith is no help,trying to touch him for a tenner. Brian makes a bizarre discovery - his latest 'scrummy' boy-friend is the son he fathered in the days when he was straight!

Psycho Paul decides to go into the human trafficking business but the sex slaves who arrive crated from Russia are not Nicole and Stephanie as hoped but the rather more fearsome Nikolai and Stepan. Judith throws over Cartoon Head to begin her new life with Marco whilst Moz and Jenny also hope to embark upon their new life,fleeing to Portugal on stolen passports and thus leaving Nicki and P.C. to take over the flat.